Dance as if no one is watching;
Love as if you can't be hurt.
Sing though no one is listening;
Live as if it's heaven on earth.

The longing

I feel bad because I haven't written anything in a few days. The only problem is there hasn't been any sex to write about. Of course I have been rather horny lately. But my husband doesn't really want to oblige. See his medication is making his libido go down hill. Which really sucks. I haven't felt much like have sex a whole lot over the last couple of years. It was really painful for a while. But lately I must be getting some kind of hormone surge, I want to have sex all the time. Now I know what it was like for my husband all that time. Why is that when one partner is always horny the other one isn't? Really what kind of cosmic joke is that?
The only thing I can figure out is that it might have something to do with the fact that I am in my 30's and supposed to be hitting my sexual peak any time now. Well why does it have to happen when my husband doesn't give a shit? I don't really want to look elsewhere, but the longing is killing me.
I think of sex morning, noon, and night. Especially the night. I am by nature a night owl and all there is on t.v and the net is sex, sex, sex. I want to pleasure myself, but that isn't enough. I want to fell a man inside me. I want to moan with delight. I want our bodies to writhe in passion. I WANT SOMEONE TO GO DOWN ON ME!!! I want to feel the wet tongue on my clit. I want to squirm and do my little thumper thing with my leg. I want to feel so good that I have to scream.(quietly of course so that my 2 year old won't make the same noises in the daytime) I need the release. I need the escape.

You Are a Visionary Soul

You are a curious person, always in a state of awareness. Connected to all things spiritual, you are very connected to your soul. You are wise and bright: able to reason and be reasonable. Occasionally, you get quite depressed and have dark feelings. You have great vision and can be very insightful. In fact, you are often profound in a way that surprises yourself. Visionary souls like you can be the best type of friend. You are intuitive, understanding, sympathetic, and a good healer. Souls you are most compatible with: Old Soul and Peacemaker Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

Well I am a sex fiend

Well I was checking out this other site that I found as a link from another site and as I was reading it, I realized that at least in my past that I am a sex fiend. She(GirlWithAOneTrackMind) was writing about how she was in the middle of a breakup and she was drinking to try to relieve her pain and they were still on good terms. They went to another bar after dinner and drank some more, they were not breaking up because they didn't have chemistry, it was because of other stuff. So they inevitably had their arms around each other and started kissing. She writes that all she wants to do is have sex with him again. He of course agrees. She states that this is the reason she is a sex fiend, that even though she knows it will hurt like hell later, she still wants to have sex with no strings attached, with someone she has had feelings for. That the sex will make some of the pain go away. That the only feelings you are still having at the time is that you can't stand it anymore and you still want to fuck.

I know exactly what this woman is feeling. I was this woman for many years. And now that I am married, I am not sure. I still want to have sex with a couple of my exes even if that is all we have. But I am not sure how I would feel about my husband if we were to split. I am not sure if I have moved on from that phase in my life. I am kind of thinking that I haven't.

Especially since all I have wanted to do lately is hook up with new people. I keep calling chat lines and emailing old friends. I have also been emailing new ones. Of course it doesn't help that my husband "allows" me to be with women. Because in my eyes cheating is cheating whether it is with a man or a woman.

My fantasy

I was in the shower and was thinking of all of the things that turn me and others on. I was thinking mostly about that rush you get when you first meet someone you think of as attractive or hot. The tingling in your nether region. The sweaty palms and the feeling of warmth all over. Especially the small amount of shyness when you are getting ready to kiss someone. The nervousness of whether it will be a good kiss and send shivers up and down your spine. You know that feeling of lust or love or whatever you want to call it that makes you so high that you can't get the other person or persons out of your mind. The feeling of bliss that makes it so you don't need to eat or sleep. All you want to do is talk to that person all night long and have mad passionate sex until the break of dawn. You don't care if you are too tired to work. It doesn't matter. All that matters is that next fix of seeing or talking to your new passion.
And as I am writing this I think I must be addicted to these feelings. It is not that I always need to fall in love, but I do need that passion. Those overwhelming feelings that I must have this person night and day. They are all I think about.
And after you have been married or with someone for awhile, a lot of those feelings go away and change. The new feelings aren't bad, just different. But I do miss the chase. I miss the lust. I miss wanting and needing to have sex several times a day.
But then again I am feeling those things again. Unfortunately they are not for my husband so much. They are for others. I wish I could find a woman. My husband doesn't have a problem with me finding one and keeping her, even if it is just for myself. As long as I tell him all about it. The idea of another woman and I having sex turns him on to no end. But lately it has been men that I have been longing for. At least the ones I have been talking to. But in my fantasies and dreams it is always a woman.
Women are different than men in so many ways. Of course there are the obvious differences. But what I am talking about are the differences when you are in a relationship, even if it is just sex. Women are generally softer and sexier. They are more willing to hold you all night long. Just to feel them close to you. But then feeling her body close to mine and her breasts pressed up against mine just makes my hands wander. I want to feel every inch of her. I want to put my fingers on her mound and feel the wetness pour forth. She is wanting me just as much. Her kisses are soft and sweet. They are sensual and just wet enough. My nipples are hard as well as hers. Our legs are intertwined and my fingers feel deep inside her. She whimpers and moans with delight. And now all I want to do is fuck the hell out of her. I put on a strap on with a vibrator for her and myself. I take her arms and slam them against the bed as I ram her till she screams. We cum together in such extacy. Then we fall to the bed and gently fall asleep.

See you in the moonlight.

Leave me a message

I know I don't have much on this site yet. But I have told a couple people about it and no one has given me any comments. the funny thing is that I have been going to a couple of other sex blogs and posting a couple of comments here and there and so we have had a little dialogue going on. So their blogs are getting larger and larger based on a few of my comments. They reply with ideas stemming from the comments.
I know I need to put more stuff on here. The funny thing is that I have been thinking about sex a lot more these days. During and after my pregnancy I wasn't allowed to have sex for nearly 6 months. And when I was finally given the o.k. when we tried it was incredibly painful. But lately, over the last 3 or 4 months I have had this insatiable need for sex. I think about it when I first wake up and all day long. I have been calling this chat line in town and I have been looking at a lot of porn on the net. This is kind of unusual for me. And the sex blogs that I have been reading have been turning me on as well. One of them actually inspired me to write this. Plus I wanted something that was more private than my other blog. Something that I could feel totally free and somewhat reckless in. But I haven't really had any fantasies much. Other than having sex with a few of my exes. And of course I always think about being with another woman. I just haven't been meeting any beautiful lesbians as of late. It has been difficult to get a sitter and go find that special woman.
I guess I will post a few more pics as I find them. I have been thinking of taking a few erotic photos of myself. I even told my husband about that one. He is definitely looking forward to having some home made porn of his wife. But I don't have a digital camera. So a friend of mine said she would let me borrow hers. I originally wasn't going to let my face be shown, but then she had the idea of me wearing a mask. That would be more erotic. It would add to the air of mystery.
The wonderful thing about my husband is that he is so turned on by me most of the time. He doesn't care what I am wearing, if I have had a shower, if the kid is around, if I am tired or anything. He just wants to bang me all day long. Thank Goddess for kiddie videos.
So if anyone has any ideas about what they would like to read about let me know. I will always take suggestions. Plus I have alot of stories, it's just that I don't think about them all at once.

My sexual exploits

Well I have been thinking and I know there isn't hardly anything on my blog yet, so I wanted to give you an idea of the kind of person I am and the fun things that I have done.

The funny thing is when I say all of these things out loud about me, I feel like a slut. Even though I have been married for the last four years and with the same man for 7 years. But I did get pretty crazy back in the day.
I have had sex with about 40 people men and women inclued. Some of them have been individually and a couple of threesome's thrown in. I even went three years of being cellibate (sp?). But for the most part I really enjoy sex and sensuality.
I enjoy other people's stories and hearing all of their secrets. Their vulnerablity just turns me on. I get to see who they really are, even if they have never told another living soul. Those secrets are my favorite.
These are some of the places that I have had my sexual exploits. I have had sex in a church on Easter Sunday, outside a church on the grass at night, in the courtyard with the statues of the saints staring at us. I have had sex in a park next to the train tracks so that I could scream louder than the train. That one was a lot of fun. I am very vocal. Although these days I have to be quiet because of the kid. I have done it in a car with someone else driving me and me lover, with us in the passenger seat of the Camaro and my hands are up in the air through the T tops as we were going down a winding road in the mountains. Also a lot of fun. I have had sex in the public pool at the hot springs in Idaho Springs. And of course other pools at different apartment complexes. In a hot tb. I did it on a train, with basically a complete stranger, in coach late at night. So if anyone woke up they deffinitely saw us. I let someone into my home after just speaking with him on the phone, with all of the lights out and only a few candles burning, so that I didn't even see his face till the next morning. But what feels good to the touch doesn't always seem like it will when you see that person in the daylight. Plus it was incredibly erotic. I have done it on a golf course. I have had sex in a 7 eleven bathroom with the employee. I have had sex with several people on the first date that ended up being long term relationships, including my husband. I have used hot wax, chains, handcuffs and legcuffs, silk scarves, feathers, food, vibrators, dildos, candles, and other toys. I have danced for my lovers like a stripper. I have had phone sex and I even did it for a living for a little while.
There is so much more to tell, but I can't possibly remember it all right now. So I will go for now, but think of me lying atop you in the park with the full moon out and the light shining upon me almost turning me into an erotic statue of marble.

See you in the moonlight.

OOOhhh Sexy!

blonde beauty

So this is my new sex and personal blog

O.k. so I hope this is going to be my safe place to write about anything and everything, but we will see. I will give this address to only a select few and the rest will have to find me on their own. So I hope you are all in for an interesting ride because I will have a lot to say for the next couple of weeks. My life is kind of crazy at the moment and I want to be able to vent and feel free.
I have been talking to this oh so wonderful younger man. He is intelligent and sexy. He gives amazing phone sex too. He has dark short hair and dark skin. His voice just makes me melt. When I hear him speak my name I just want to cum. So I hope the rest of you will want to as well when you read my stories.
But for now this is only the beginning. I will write more and often. I have a lot to say and so many ideas. But goodbye for now.

See you in the moonlight.